Tony the Roach

[piano music] And we're live. Thank you, Dickie. You got it, babe. Ladies and gentlemen, she is ready. [applause] Now, here's the thing. I know a song about that. [piano music] Stop. Tonight's guest is Tony the Roach. He's a North Jersey businessman who apparently has some issues with me. Apparently. Thank you. Thank you. The man of the hour, baby. [applause] Sit down, Tony. I just want to say, I got some things to address. Things to address, like who dressed you? [laughs] That's how you're going to interview me? What? With your feet up? Yeah. Hold on. Yeah. You don't even have a desk. No. What kind of talk show doesn't have a desk? Mine. Sit down. So Tony, you asked to come on because you have a problem with me. Yeah. What did I do? You embarrassed me. There's a rumor you live in your mother's basement. That true? Because it's kind of sad for a 40-year-old. You sit there with your feet up like you don't care about anybody. I don't. What is that doing there? That's disrespectful. This is my show. Also, I'm sorry about the Giants thing. I was wrong. I knew you were shit. They ultra suck, actually. Fortunately, it's that time of the night for our musical guest. Thanks for being here, Tony. Wait, that's it? What kind of talk show you running here? Who is the musical guest? [That's Life plays] And now, the time has come to say goodbye. That's life. [That's Life plays]