Sand, Sloths, and Sabotage

[door knocking] Door's open. Calm down. Eris wants in on the gauntlet. I already have my choices. By the way, you need a Mentos. Mentos, the fresh maker. Cut. That's a wrap, guys. This next match is scheduled for one fall. One fall. [cheering] It's fine. Hailing from Florida by way of the rainforests of South America, Sloth. I cannot do this. And his opponent, from the small Greek island of Delmam, but hailing now from Los Angeles, California, he is the eclectic keyist, Apollo Moonbalm Ice, being accompanied to the ring by Aphridia. [dramatic music] [glass shatters] [screaming] [cheering] [squelching] [upbeat music] [cheering] There's a sloth on my stage. Unacceptable. Sweetie, he hasn't moved once since the crate. Sees a nice floor. [ground rumbling] [upbeat music] The spotlight is mine, and I shall not share it with a rug. [ground rumbling] Clean up, middle of the ring. Bring a vacuum. [vacuum cleaning] [sloth burping] [coin dinging] You were amazing, darling. What say we skedaddle, and I let you lick my ice cream? Yes, queen. Good, then you won't notice I'm keeping the medal. [squelching] Listen up, gentlemen, and Mo. Hey. Do you got it? Three slaps. One. [slap landing] Two. [slap landing] Three. You mean like this? [slaps landing] Yes, just like that. No more of this hazard-ness with the counts. Slap the mat three times and call for the bell. That's it. Bell. Bell. [foot stomping] [dramatic music] [screaming] Hope nobody saw that. [somber music] [growls] [air whooshing] [screaming] [body thudding]